Family pictures and the craziness

Saturday my mother-in-law wanted family pictures taken professionally.  She had planned this about 2 weeks in advance.  My brother-in-law and his girlfriend were coming up from Southern California for the weekend.  We haven't had pictures taken s a family in 5 years.  The kids have grown and changed plus Allysa and E(brother-in-law's girlfriend) were not in the last pictures.  It was time for new pictures.  We only had to coordinate 14 people's schedules.

Last Thursday night my mother-in-law hadn't been able to get a hold of the photographer she wanted to use.  I went to the mall and made an appointment at the photo studio.  I made the appointment for 7pm.  Allysa was working all day from 9am to 4pm.  I knew the very earliest she could be home, showered,  and ready for pictures was 6pm.  I told my mother-in-law about Allysa's schedule and the time she would be available.

Friday M (my mother-in-law) finally gets a hold of her photographer.  The photographer is available only at 4:30 and 5:30.  Obviously that wouldn't work.  I tried to tell M that it wouldn't work, Jer tried talking to her.  The response we got was well Allysa can just hurry.  Since she has been working for 7 hours she should already look good for pictures.  I'm frustrated as hell.  I got to tell Allysa about the time change.  She is not close to happy.  She told me to take the pictures without her (Damn she is so much like her mom).  I refuse to have family pictures without her.  After 19 years of never having family pictures with all of my children I was not about to let this happen again. 

I go back and try to explain to M and she very nicely (because she really is sweet) just says well we can take them at 5:45, I'm sure Allysa can be available by then.  I felt like I was hitting my head against a brick wall.  Was anybody listening?  6pm is the very earliest Allysa would be available, not 5:30 or 5:45.


M also decided that everyone should wear white shirts.  White stains easy, we do not own many white items of clothing.  Saturday about noon we went shopping because Cassie had absolutely no white shirts.  By this time Allysa and I had text back and forth and she had no idea how she was going to get there 15 minutes earlier Let alone 30 minutes earlier than she expected.   I was stuck in the middle between my daughter and M. 

And in this all I found out that my brother in law and E were not informed of us having family pictures until they arrived the night before.  Of course they did not pack any white shirts.  The lack of communication was making for one long day. 

Allysa realized that the only thing she could eat at the family meal after we took pictures was beans and rice.  My in-laws planned a nice tamale dinner but Allysa couldn't eat any of it.  She was freaking out about that too.  She just wanted to be able to eat what everyone else had.  She was tired of her allergies and M cooking for everyone but her.  Tamales are great but when you sit there and smell them and know you can't eat them it really sucks.  I made a vegan tamale pie that was big enough for everyone to have and Allysa wouldn't feel totally left out. But  I didn't know about Allysa's feelings about dinner until about 5pm.  I had to quickly find a good recipe and start cooking before pictures and try not to get dirty. Did I say that I am supposed to cook this on the stove but all of the burners were being used?  Let's add one more thing onto my stress level.

The photographer shows up early!!!! Shoot me now seriously, just get me out of this chaos.  She showed up about 5:10 ready to take pictures.  We decided on the 2 locations to take pictures at the house and each family went individually and then we were to do the group shot last. 

Allysa busted ass and made it by 5:45.  She was stressed, PMS-ing, in a foul mood but she was there.  We took the pictures quickly and then did the finishing touches for tamale dinner. 

Jer's aunt shows up for dinner.  Allysa does not get a long very well with her.  Allysa is open, wild, loud, and says things before she thinks (just like her mom.)  Jer's aunt is very conservative and her feathers are easily ruffled.  Having Jer's aunt there just about put Allysa's emotions over the edge.  After the first time Allysa and this aunt met Jer got a phone call from this aunt about Allysa being inappropriate. 

Allysa, her boyfriend,  and her siblings decided to eat outside.  It was cold and dark but they decided they didn't want to deal with anyone.  By this point I was so tired and drained emotionally I couldn't eat and just went upstairs to lay down and cry.  I couldn't handle making peace with everyone.  I was tired of making excuses and to soothe every one's emotions.  I had spent 2 days trying to deal and cope with everyone and make everyone at peace.  I couldn't handle sitting down and making small talk at that moment.  It was just easier to be alone.

The next day I found out from Allysa that part of the reason she was so upset was because Owen couldn't be in the picture.  Oh how I love the blessings of adoption.  It always adds another element to our everyday life.